Random Movie Club

January 17, 2010

AVANTI!

Your January 2010 Unrandom Movie Club Results Are In!

Tagline: Italy Was Full of Surprises!

Preshow Entertainment: None

Pizza: Papa John's

JACK ASS

A little over three months ago, Billy Wilder's A FOREIGN AFFAIR came up randomly. It was such a treat to see a previously unwatched Wilder movie that I figured, why not do it again, this time for UMC? I suppose another reason for this selection was that AVANTI! (1972) was playing on one of the HD channels. Anyway, all the pieces seemed to fall into place. Except for the part where we'd see Jack Lemmon's ass. Twice. No one warned me about that.

The team of Billy/Jack unite for a sixth time, and although AVANTI! is fun and well worth watching, it's not exactly the sharp Wilder movie we're accustomed to (Wilder himself was disappointed with the final product). If only it wasn't waaaaay too long (a common criticism of AVANTI!), this movie would have rocked. Except for the parts where, and I may have mentioned this earlier, you get to see Jack Lemmon's ass. That's like seeing your father's friend's ass. It's creepy, not to mention flabby and pasty.

The private Armbruster Industries plane screeches to a halt like the Blues Brothers parking their Bluesmobile. Out jumps overwhelmed businessman Wendell Armbruster (Lemmon), who barely makes it up the stairs before the plane takes off. Dressed in a loud golfing outfit (is that really a pink terrycloth shirt under that red cardigan?), he approaches a hawkish passenger. We don't hear what they're saying, but we do know a proposal is underway. Soon, Armbruster and the man jump into the bathroom... together, much to the consternation of not only the passengers, but also the pilot. But even though this is a gay joke done silent movie style, it's just a tone-setting cold open. Armbruster and the man simply swapped clothes, for he is on his way to Italy to claim the body of his deceased father. Wait, didn't LOST have this same scene?

It's clear from the moment Armbruster deplanes that retrieving the body and heading back to Baltimore will not be easy. Nope, before he gets to go home his stay will include small details like the red tape of getting a mandatory silk coffin, health certificates and export licenses...not to mention the entire country closing down for three hour lunches and the entire day of Sunday. On a grander scale, Armbruster will have to contend with missing corpses, the local mafia, a blackmailing valet and the fact that his dad was not alone when he died in that car crash.

How does he know his dad was with another woman? He learns it from loverly Brit Pamela Piggott (Juliet Mills), also in town to retrieve a body. Figure it out yet?

Armbruster is perpetually stressed out and impatient, the opposite of Pamela's simple, carefree shopgirl. And though he may be the businessman, she is the one who understands, and more importantly, enjoys life. Is it possible these two can be happy together?

AVANTI! is populated with characters you might find down the rabbit hole, played with a 10% Cartoon Factor, like the Trotta family, whose vineyard was bruised by the elder Armbruster/Piggott car crash. Or the genteel, lisping bartender. Or Bruno, the hotel's valet who was in the mafia "...only part-time." But the stand-out is Clive Revill as the Grand Excelsior Hotel's congenial manager Carlo Carlucci, who despite being the constant bringer of bad news, is always there for Armbruster.

And just when you thought you'd seen all the players and things are wrapping up, enter character actor Edward Andrews as J.J. Blodgett. You know Andrews from a googol of roles, dating back to the Golden Age of Television, through Doris Day movies, TWILIGHT ZONES and Samantha Baker's grandfather in 16 CANDLES.

Stealing the show is Italian actor Pippo Franco (the name alone makes me laugh) as the meticulous coroner. It's almost impossible not to lose it at this scene. In fact, I defy you not to laugh. But the real magic trick here is that Wilder makes Franco's comedy play concurrently with Pamela identifying her mother's body...and it's pretty much all done silently. It's a thing of beauty, a balancing act rarely achieved. The last shot of the scene, after everyone exits, shows Pamela holding flowers as she stands beside her deceased mom in the cavernous room. It's a medium shot, lit beautifully. It says so much.

There are a lot of laugh-out-loud moments in AVANTI! My favorite was when the valet wheels Armbruster's luggage into his room. It's just a small attache case on a huge cart (Armbruster had to dash off to the airport, remember? So he didn't really have any luggage). Valet: "Shall I unpack for you?"

Jack Lemmon is so right for the role because he's done it so many times before. He's so good at the exasperated everyman. Has there ever been anyone better? Plus with Lemmon, you know they'll be a scene where he's wearing pajamas. It may have been a contractual thing.

One of the movie's peculiar elements is the constant referral to Pamela Piggott as fat. At one time, Armbruster actually refers to her as "fat-ass." What's odd is that, though Mills gained weight for the role, she is in no way fat. Perhaps this was the Age of Twiggy (who is mentioned at one point), or maybe it's just the case that in drama, sometimes saying makes it so. I mean, even she says she has a weight problem. And I suppose her last name is almost "pig out." No matter, for Juliet Mills (Hayley's her kid sister) is so perfect here, strutting about with confidence on the outside and insecurity on the inside.

And I bet her nude sunbathing (with Lemmon's ass next to her) in AVANTI! must have raised a few eyebrows, as this movie was made seconds after her turn as the prim nanny in NANNY AND THE PROFESSOR. She considers AVANTI! the highlight of her career. Hell, if I worked for Wilder, so would I. Still Mills followed AVANTI! with the super low budgie EXORCIST rip-off BEYOND THE DOOR. Go figger. (AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I saw BEYOND THE DOOR.)

AVANTI! was co-written by Wilder and longtime writing partner I. A. L. Diamond. It's the second (SABRINA was first) Wilder film from a Samuel Taylor play. Taylor wrote Wilder and Hitchcock films, almost concurrently, making him one of the coolest cats ever. I'm not sure what combination of these three writers wrote the speech Pamela gives about America being greedy, but it's so smart. Watch out for that part.

Despite its length, AVANTI! (Italian for "forward," though in this case, it means "come in!" when someone asks to enter your room) wraps all of its farcical elements up in a bow as tight as anyone's ass but Jack Lemmon's. Sure, it's a play-by-numbers movie (contentious relationship turns to love), but the journey is sweet and wonderful. Billy Wilder made a movie that's like tiramisu.

Oh, yes, there's one more thing. This movie made me really want to do something - visit Italy. Avanti!

Posted by Rich at 10:00 AM | Permalink |

January 02, 2010

HOMICIDAL

Your December Random Movie Club Results Are In!

Tagline: A WORD OF WARNING! Please don't reveal the ending of this picture or your friends will kill you - IF THEY DON'T, I WILL! - William Castle

Preshow Entertainment: YOU BET YOUR LIFE

Pizza: Bravo? No! Royal Pizza? No! Lenzini's? Si!

HOMICIDAL IS CHEAP, JUICY AND DELICIOUS, SO IT COMES AS NO SURPRISE IT WAS MADE BY MEN WHOSE LAST NAMES WERE WHITE AND CASTLE

William Castle's HOMICIDAL. To say this is a rip-off of PSYCHO would not get you sued for slander. In fact, on a talk show, the Godfather of Soul mistakenly asked The Master of Suspense about "his" movie HOMICIDAL. It's said that Hitch was well aware of Castle's films, and how they were all done on such tiny budgets. This led to him doing PSYCHO, so you see? Full circle.

A fabulous turnout made tonight's movie experience so much fun...not that HOMICIDAL isn't fun on its own. But first we had to order the pizza - three times. The first, Bravo, didn't answer. The second, Royal Pizza, had a voicemail that went to someone's private residence, an odd way to do business, unless you're an escort service. We finally hit with Lenzini's, a new place.

I've seen HOMICIDAL before. A friend was trying to find a copy for his sister, who had seen it when it first came out. I can't remember if I had HOMICIDAL in the RMC collection or if I came across it soon after, but I was able to make a copy for her, and as I did, I watched. And loved it.

HOMICIDAL begins with gimmick-meister William Castle himself, smoking a cigar and doing needlepoint as he addresses us and intros the film. Then -

Talk about a big opening; Emily (Jean Arless), an alluring, mysterious bucket of hotitude checks into a hotel and immediately pays a bellhop to marry her. Then, she murders someone right before his eyes (I know this type well). We soon learn that Emily is a care provider for mute and wheelchaired Helga (Eugenie Leontovich).

Visiting Helga's house are Miriam Webster (Patricia Breslin)...that's Miriam, not Merriam...and her step brother Warren. Something is odd about Warren. You can't really put your finger on it, though it's not entirely impossible to. Is this simply the case of an awful actor? Why does it sound like a bad dubbing job? What gives??? Well, something does give, but I'm not spilling.

There are a lot of unexplained things that Emily does (don't worry, it all gets sorted out), but this much is true - even without her murdering someone, Emily is clearly psycho in more of a premeditated way. She's Norma Bates with an agenda, although sometimes cold and calculated, other times she's fragile (watch out for those times as well). I love how her plan unfolds, leaving us in the dark, as it should. We're also provided with a lot of backstory. A lot. From drunken car crashes, tormented youngsters, trips to Denmark, a suspicious coparcenary, strokes, nurses that quit, Justices of the Peace that are paid off...but hang on to every word. It'll all make sense. And there are a lot of clues, too. A lot.

I love that HOMICIDAL takes place in Solvang, California. There's something so right about that. Why can't Danish communities have their share of maniacs? It's been too many years since HAMLET. And it's no mere coincidence that the movie is Dane-centric.

Solvang is populated with TV actors whose combined resumes cover every single show ever aired. NOTE: Jean Arless was really Joan Marshall, who played Lily (then called Phoebe) in the unaired (but available on DVD) THE MUNSTERS pilot. Coincidentally, I just caught her appearance on a JACK BENNY SHOW.

It's hard to believe how much fun this silly, cheap thriller is. Man, it could have been a classic in the hands of a master. But now it's relegated to a goofy fun, like THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE or ORPHAN, and I see absolutely nothing wrong with that. It works on its own terms, PSYCHO comparisons aside.

Its undoing is actually its gimmick of a Fright Clock that holds the picture for forty-five seconds at the end of the movie to warn you that it's about to get really scary. Castle was the King of Gimmicks, none coming close to THE TINGLER, where movie theaters' chairs were rigged to vibrate, as if The Tingler was loose in the theater (The Film Forum in NYC did this at a screening and it was silly fun). HOMICIDAL had not only its Fright Clock, but a Coward's Corner in the lobby. If you got scared, you had to walk the yellow line to the lobby and stand in a spotlight. Endure that, and you got your money back. I'm not sure any money was ever returned, as the humiliation factor alone kept people out of the Coward's Corner. Castle also made the movie SHANKS (in the RMC library), starring Marcel Marceau as a mute puppeteer who reanimates corpses.

Written by frequent Castle collaborator Robb White (THE TINGLER, HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL, 13 GHOSTS), HOMICIDAL is the guiltiest of pleasures, unless you count boffing your boss' wife and daughter (separately or together, your choice). Again, it makes for a credible thriller, if not for Warren's wooden dubbing and that damn Fright Clock (though as far as film history is concerned, I'm glad it's there). Even the lighting is superb and the music moody and creepy. I could see why my friend's sister wanted to see it again after so many years.

STOP! The next paragraphs, which contain SPOILERS, might prove too scary for you to read. You must stop here or walk the yellow line to the RMC Coward's Corner.

If you're reading this, then you've either seen the movie or you don't give a crap about being surprised should you ever see HOMICIDAL. It turns out that Jean Arless plays Warren, too. The fact that Warren's voice is dubbed actually gives the movie a creepy feel, as well as something to laugh at. If you don't figure out the gag, you're likely to believe that the actor was, for some reason, dubbed by the moviemakers out of necessity, not plot. And while we're on the topic, after the movie ends, Jean Arless comes out as Warren and Emily, and they take a bow together. Done in a split screen, natch.

PRESHOW ENTERTAINMENT: YOU BET YOUR LIFE

Groucho was the host of the comedy/talk show disguised as a game show YOU BET YOUR LIFE, which ran on NBC for 11 years. I used to watch these at 4am when I was a teen (they were reruns...I'm not THAT old). The show relied more on Groucho's strong suit, which was his ability to ad lib, and as if to drive that point home, more time was spent talking to the players than actually playing the game.

This episode, from 1958, featured contestants Pop Carter and Marilyn wannabe Lari Laine, who was, as she put it, "an actress." She actually did about a dozen or so TV shows and movies, but this was only after gracing the cover of the May 1958 Playboy.

As she explained to Groucho, she was on TV three times a week doing commercials for a tire company, where she was called Miss Boom Boom. Miss Boom Boom is now 73.

Her co-contestant, Bob Carter, was 102 (born in 1856). His secret to long life - "I eat anything I want...I've smoked since I was two years old." Cocky smartass. Maybe if you lost that attitude you could have lived longer. Anyway, he has 19 great great (wait for it...) great grandchildren. Some of them may be reading this now.

But get this; he said he was a roller skater...and look what I found online, about Dearduff Roller Rink in Litchfield, Illinois, which opened in 1947:

The youngest skater is Linda Irvine, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Melvin Irvine of Litchfield. She began skating at the age of fourteen months. The oldest skater was "Pop" Carter, the world's oldest skater, who skated here two years ago at the age of ninety-two.

Posted by Rich at 10:00 AM | Permalink |

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