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Preshow Entertainment: The 2000 Academy Awards Preshow

Pizza: Dominos

PHFFFT IS, WITHOUT A DOUBT,
THE BEST VOWELLESS JACK LEMMON MOVIE EVER.

When the title to this movie first came up, I thought it was that 70s movie about a snake. But that one's called SSSSSSSS. Someone should program these movies as a double bill, so people can ask the box office, "Can I get one ticket to PHFFFT and SSSSSSS please?" Anyway, before we go further, let me explain that silly title, as I'm almost sure you don't know what it means (we didn't). It was the catchphrase to signify a celebrity couple were divorcing, used in Walter Winchell's gossip column (which is shown in the movie when the two leads split). I imagine at the time of its release in 1954 they thought that was a keen title, but time would prove that wrong. It would be like naming a movie GANGNAM STYLE today. By the way, the studio had to debate for hours over whether to use three F's in the title or 4. The movie is listed with an exclamation point on Wikipedia, but without one on IMDB (for the record, Wiki is wrong). This may be the worst title everrr!

But not the worst movie ever. PHFFFT is a fluffy movie featuring Jack Lemmon, who was just becoming Jack Lemmon. You know what I mean; the stammering everyman that he did so well....so well that he sort of made that character his. I'm sure there's a Lemmon Law joke in that. Anyway...

All lawyer Robert (Lemmon) wants is some peace and quiet, to relax on his couch, sip coffee and read a murder novel (HE STOOPED TO KILL). He's half of the soon to be split couple along with his wife Nina (Judy Holliday) who is a writer for the NBC soap opera SERENA NOBLE, DOCTOR'S WIFE. Nina broaches the subject and he agrees. It's so casual that while arguing on who thought of the divorce idea first, he opens a bottle of beer and, without asking, pours two glasses and hands her one. So natural, without thinking. That's how comfy this couple is. As their divorce conversation continues, they get undressed and ready for bed. This isn't schtick, it's subtext.

So it's off to Reno! Back then, Reno was the place to go for a quickie divorce due to their lenient residency laws. Even stars like Rita Hayworth went there. Anyway, PHFFFT follows the basic screwball mandates as divorcees Robert and Nina engage in one-upsmanship, each trying to prove how great they are doing without the other...when they're really not. It's a good thing people in relationships don't know they can actually talk to each other about their feelings. Otherwise, there'd be no romantic comedies. Although in the movies, things seem to always work out. I guess that's what people want to see, instead of the real life version, where your soul is crushed and your heart ripped to shreds. Anyway...

Robert moves in with his old navy buddy Charlie (Jack Carson), a player who tries to get Bobby back in the game. He shows him a statue he's named Sam, who, when you turn it around, means your roommate has a girl in the room. Sam is their Sock or Scunci-on-the-doorknob. Meanwhile, Nina and her mom go to dinner, and who should be there? Bob and Charlie. And the games begin. One of these games involve each of them dating someone else; she the male lead of SERENA NOBLE, and he Charlie's friend Janis, played like Marilyn Monroe by Kim Novak. By the way, there's a gag where Janis knows about turning Sam around, signaling to Robert that she's been with Charlie. This exact gag is repeated in the movie TRIBUTE, also with Lemmon. In that movie, Kim Cattrall, who claimed to have never been in the apartment, pressed the button to reveal the hidden bar.

Of course, these forays don't work out well for either of them. Neither do Nina's language lessons and Robert's art lessons, nor their mutual rhumba lessons they're unaware the other is taking. This leads to a fun dance showdown, perhaps the highlight of the movie. Lemmon's antics (grow a moustache, buy a sports car, take dancing lessons) are knee jerk reactions to losing yourself. It's nice to know that emotionally, we still act as kids when we don't get our way. And since we're privy, we see that they are both doing the same things, just not in each other's company - singing the same song, dining at the same restaurant, dance lessons, these are two peas in a pod.

Because this was Lemmon's second movie, he lost out on top billing to Judy Holliday. His first movie, the funnier romcom IT SHOULD HAPPEN TO YOU, was released earlier that same year and also starred Holliday. I imagine PHFFFT was a bit ribald for its time, with its quickie divorce, women who ask strangers to turn their backs so they can change their clothes, and dialogue like when Charlie says "You're gonna have a ball" when he sets Robert up with a sure thing. A bit of casting that I found just a tiny bit odd, only because of Holliday's BORN YESTERDAY role, was having Kim Novak as the bimbo. This was Novak's third movie, and like Lemmon, her first year on screen.

PHFFFT was written by the great George Axelrod (MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE, BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S), who stated that Holliday, Carson and Lemmon were brilliant comedy actors - it was the director (Mark Robson) that was miscast. I believe he was right. Regardless, this was by no means the greatest movie ever made, but it's not bad either...and it's great to see Lemmon volley with Holliday. Axelrod fills the script with snappy patter, like Robert's "I can tell everything about a person from their cancelled checks" and his marriage proposal of "If we were to file a joint return..." "Boobs and Boobs" (Dumb men and...you know, sexy women) is how Axelrod termed so much of his work. That's what people want. Boobs and boobs. My, how times haven't changed.

Preshow Entertainment: The 2000 Academy Awards Preshow

Don't ask why I have so much crap. I mean, who tapes (in the age of VHS) and keeps, the preshow to the 2000 Academy Awards. Ucch. Laura Diaz and Marc Brown. Man, do I despise awards shows.

So we have George Pennacchio and Roger Ebert interviewing Douglas Wick, the producer of GLADIATOR. I still haven't gotten around to seeing GLADIATOR...but maybe since I've seen the AA Preshow, I now have license. We didn't get to watch too much of the show, but we did get to see, in a retrospective package, a few celebs say it best. Heather Graham: "Tonight it's all about the dress." Richard Dreyfuss: "Twelve months from now, honestly, you'll make a lot of cash betting that no one can remember who won."

Posted by Rich on April 20, 2013 at 8:00 AM | Permalink