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40 Yr Old Virgin Poster

Tagline: A Comedy about the moments that touch us in ways we've never been touched before.


We viewed another 45 minutes of commercials from the '50s-'70s. Lots of soap ads (one with Jacklyn Smith), Crest ("Dad! I only had one cavity!") with stannous fluoride, and a product called Blem!

Everyone remembers THE 40 YEAR-OLD VIRGIN for Steve Carell's chest waxing scene and how screamingly funny it is (it was real and he was in real pain, so naturally, it's funny). Well, that scene is a metaphor for title character Andy Stitzer- the feeling of being scared and hurt to lose something you've lived with for your entire life. And as a viewer, we really get to feel his pain, both inside his head and on his body. His virginity was a secret he never told, and hair was not the only thing he needed to get off his chest.

And that's the secret to the movie's success, whether you're a virgin or senior member of your local spur posse, you understand Andy's silent agony. Andy isn't Steve Carell...Andy is you, my friend.

Andy wakes up daily with a sequoia tree's amount of wood (4 decades in the making, well, I suppose technically more like 3) between his legs, with no release in sight. He is so resigned to his routine that he's become complacent, not really caring that this is what his life has become. Even when his incredulous friends learn of his virginity, Andy is reluctant to do anything. At this point in his life, it's simply a bother. But soon his trio of horndog co-workers (if co-workers were this funny in real life, we'd all love going to work) decide to help him get laid. Which is funny, since David (Paul Rudd) has been unable to cope since his girlfriend of 4 months broke up with him 2 years ago, Jay (Romany Malco) is a serial cheater, and Cal (Seth Rogen) doesn't seem like a ladykiller. But they're guys, so in their heads, they've figured out the world and it revolves around them.

And herein lies the quest. And since Andy doesn't know how to talk to women (or men, for that matter), it's a challenge indeed. Previously, his skills included collecting action figures ("Is that The Six Million Dollar Man's BOSS???"). Having no car, he rides a bike to work. The sight of him walking into work each day holding the front wheel of his bike tells you everything. But for added measure, in an early scene, when Cal tells Andy he went to a show in Tijuana over the weekend to watch a woman fuck a horse, then asks Andy what he did, Andy tells him he was really in the mood for egg salad so he spent 3 hours making...egg salad.

Poor Andy cannot escape the notion of sex. He's ribbed by all the guys at work, and eventually even his boss offers herself up as a fuck buddy. The guy can't even walk down a street without a bus with a giant ad for a perfume called ERUPTION driving next to him. No matter how slow or fast he walks or runs, that damn bus is beside him. It will always be beside him.

And when he finally gets to go home with a girl who is so drunk she needs him to blow into a Breathalyzer in the car (she informs him that the judge thought it would be a good idea), he doesn't know how to speak to her. When she says he has kind eyes, he stammers and replies "um, you have sequins on your hat." Yes, Andy is part Chauncey Gardener.

A lot of people thought this movie had heart, and are they ever correct. VIRGIN's first half is wall to wall jokes, and the second half, where he starts dating Trish, is all heart. Catherine Keener plays love interest Trish like Diane Keaton with backstory damage, making it totally believable she would be attracted to Andy. She too has a secret (3 kids...one of which has a kid, which I suppose makes her a GILF, and biker exes), and she's tired of bad boys. Andy makes sense to her.

Director and co-writer (with Carell) Judd Apatow's (Hey! We're both from Syosset!) keen eye keeps things moving with ancillary characters that don't trip over the story. He also colors lots of scenes with hidden schtick...people don't just talk, they play video games and break fluorescent light bulbs. Apatow, who besides working on THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW made the very smart, very funny and, naturally, very short-lived sitcom UNDECLARED (umm, Netflix Queue, people?). He also, along with series creator and nicest guy in Hollywood Paul Feig, did the very smart, very funny, and you guessed it, very short-lived FREAKS AND GEEKS. For VIRGIN, Apatow towed some of his undeclared freaks and geeks with him- Seth Rogen, Steve Bannos, Jenna Fischer, Loudon Wainright III, and Carla Gallo (as the now-famous Toe-Sucking Girl). There are a million, no, two million little bits of comedy throughout the movie. I wouldn't know how to begin a list (though Jane Lynch's pitch-perfect turn as Andy's boss Paula singing him her Guatemalan love song ranks high up there).

This movie is fucking funny. BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN? MUNICH? Puhlease! THE 40 YEAR-OLD VIRGIN was the best movie of 2005.

"You should fuck her and then have her send you $12 on your birthday." -Cal (Seth Rogen), when learning the girl Andy likes is a grandmother.

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