>>> Click here for the RMC FAQ'N RULES <<<

RIVER RED

The world is not always great. This was proven at this month's RMC. All those who failed to show up...are lucky.

The Preshow Entertainment was newsreels from 1935. These were pretty interesting. We saw a car breaking the land-speed record of 300mph (pretty impressive for 1935, I'm thinking), as well as some of the Lindbergh baby kidnapping trial of Bruno Hauptman.

As for the movie, let this be a lesson to me. I see some cute girl and I feel obligated to tape every fucking movie they're in. This practice must stop right now. This way, we won't have to sit through movies like RIVER RED.

RIVER RED is like watching honey drip off the side of a table for 2 hours. It's about 2 brothers (one played by Tom Everett Scott of THAT THING YOU DO, and the other Duncan from ZOEY, DUNCAN, JACK & JANE) who kill their kid-beating dad to prevent further abuse.

On the surface, it has a really good idea behind it, as one brother takes the jail stint to protect the other, and how this affects both of their lives. But man, did each shot have to be filmed in a master shot, of two people talking... maybe 8 lines of dialogue in 5 minutes time. I mean, it's a MOVE EEE. MOVE. Someone move. Anyone. Don't just sit and have silence for a full minute, then one line of dialogue. BIRTH OF A NATION had more lines. Oh, oh, oh, wait. There was movement. In maybe a dozen shots, we'd sit and watch one person standing in the foreground as another character took 30 seconds to walk over to him. Hey, the fact that they live on a LAKE and not a RIVER of any color should tell you something.

Even Cara Buono, who was the reason I taped this waste of a dog's time, couldn't save this movie if she looked into the camera and said "I want you, Rich." But I get to say what I love to say after seeing a bad movie. "At least we never have to see that again."

Tags: , , ,








Feed Burner Subscribe in a reader



Powered byFeedBlitz


About ...

RMC email address
Old RMC Men

RMC is not affiliated with Rochester Midland Corporation, makers of fine restroom disinfecting fluids and urinal mats since 1888.

Archives

Powered by Pizza, Red Vines,
& 6 Different Kinds of Soda

RMC MASCOT

RMC HERO

www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Random Movie Club. Make your own badge here.


((( Contribute to our Popcorn Fund! )))




Best Viewed With Firefox 2



Add to Google
Add to My Yahoo!
Add to Technorati Favorites!


Blimp!
eXTReMe Tracker